Don't Worry, They'll Tell You.
This is my version of the "How can you tell if someone is a vegan?" meme, which I've also seen with "atheist". It might be funny to some people, but my real life experience from yesterday is but one illustration (out of many) of the perhaps 90+% of the time when it's the other way around. It's only when the minority finally voices their marginalized opinions that the aggressors believe it is we who are rude and outspoken!
In my non-internet life, I am extremely polite and non-confrontational. I don't voice my opinions to pretty much anyone, even those close to me. And to those I've never even met before, I am polite to the greatest degree possible. Here is a story about what happened yesterday. I will put it in the form of a dialog. Of course, it was longer, and I can't remember everything, but I'll give you the gist. My thoughts are in parentheses.
Setting: I am out for a walk to exercise and enjoy the day, and I walk past some turtles on a log in a swampy area and an older woman.
Carnivorous Creatard Woman (=CCW): Hey, are those turkles or turtles?
Me: Uh...
CCW: Those things. Are they turkles or turtles?
Me: What are turkles? I only know turtles. (...And terrapins and tortoises...)
CCW: Turkles? They're like turtles. I don't know them apart. All I know is that when I was younger, we used to go turklin'.
Me: Turklin'?
CCW: Yeah. We used to grab them turkles...or turtles...and have 'em for dinner. You know what's amazing? They taste like chicken and beef and pork. Each part tastes like a different meat. You can have one turkle and taste each meat.
Me: Interesting... (Please let me leave now.)
CCW: I work at Bible Broadcasting. Do you know where that is?
Me: Yeah. I know where that is.
CCW: I work with an Ecuadorian woman. She is a missionary to the United States! Isn't that nice?
Me: Yeah. That's nice. (Can I leave now?)
CCW: My daughter is a wedding photographer. She's a great photographer and can make more money from people, but she's a good Christian girl, so she doesn't charge as much as she should.
Me: That's cool that she can do what she enjoys.
CCW: Sorry for keeping you. I'll let you go.
Me: OK. Nice talking with you.
CCW: By the way, are you a Christian?
Me: Well, actually, you know, I lived in Japan for nearly a decade. I made a lot of friends over there, and most of them are Buddhist. (Actually, most are probably atheist or agnostic, but never mind that.) So, I think that everyone can sort of have their own way to understand the universe. You know, I don't think that 99% of people in Japan would go to Hell or anything like that.
CCW: Let me tell you something, and this will be quick. But I need to tell you this. I gave my life over to Jesus, and now no matter what happens in my life, I don't mind it. I can overcome it.
Me: Wow. That's great. (You said this will be quick. Can I go now? A family of joggers and their dog are looking at us.)
CCW: You know evolution is false, right? Yeah, like evolution happened! Like a fully formed car is going to just pop out of the ground! Evolution is wrong!
Me: I see. (I'm trying to leave now, so I won't point out that no evolutionary biologists think that a car will pop out of the ground, but religious people like you can believe that a car would just pop out of the ground...it would just be a "miracle". But although I hope we never meet again, I hope we can part in peace.)
CCW: Also, you know, humans have spirits! Animals don't! You know John 3:16, right?
This is my version of the "How can you tell if someone is a vegan?" meme, which I've also seen with "atheist". It might be funny to some people, but my real life experience from yesterday is but one illustration (out of many) of the perhaps 90+% of the time when it's the other way around. It's only when the minority finally voices their marginalized opinions that the aggressors believe it is we who are rude and outspoken!
In my non-internet life, I am extremely polite and non-confrontational. I don't voice my opinions to pretty much anyone, even those close to me. And to those I've never even met before, I am polite to the greatest degree possible. Here is a story about what happened yesterday. I will put it in the form of a dialog. Of course, it was longer, and I can't remember everything, but I'll give you the gist. My thoughts are in parentheses.
Setting: I am out for a walk to exercise and enjoy the day, and I walk past some turtles on a log in a swampy area and an older woman.
Carnivorous Creatard Woman (=CCW): Hey, are those turkles or turtles?
Me: Uh...
CCW: Those things. Are they turkles or turtles?
Me: What are turkles? I only know turtles. (...And terrapins and tortoises...)
CCW: Turkles? They're like turtles. I don't know them apart. All I know is that when I was younger, we used to go turklin'.
Me: Turklin'?
CCW: Yeah. We used to grab them turkles...or turtles...and have 'em for dinner. You know what's amazing? They taste like chicken and beef and pork. Each part tastes like a different meat. You can have one turkle and taste each meat.
Me: Interesting... (Please let me leave now.)
CCW: I work at Bible Broadcasting. Do you know where that is?
Me: Yeah. I know where that is.
CCW: I work with an Ecuadorian woman. She is a missionary to the United States! Isn't that nice?
Me: Yeah. That's nice. (Can I leave now?)
CCW: My daughter is a wedding photographer. She's a great photographer and can make more money from people, but she's a good Christian girl, so she doesn't charge as much as she should.
Me: That's cool that she can do what she enjoys.
CCW: Do you know of Corrie Ten Boom? (Note: I think this is who she mentioned, after looking it up on the internet.)
Me: No. I don't think I've heard of her.
CCW: She was a Christian who helped hide Jews from the Nazis. She was arrested. She escaped, but one more day and she would have been gassed. Years later, the Nazi who was going to gas her came to her and asked for forgiveness. I wouldn't have been able to forgive him, but God forgave him!
Me: Yeah, I wouldn't have been able to forgive him, either.
Me: OK. Nice talking with you.
CCW: By the way, are you a Christian?
Me: Well, actually, you know, I lived in Japan for nearly a decade. I made a lot of friends over there, and most of them are Buddhist. (Actually, most are probably atheist or agnostic, but never mind that.) So, I think that everyone can sort of have their own way to understand the universe. You know, I don't think that 99% of people in Japan would go to Hell or anything like that.
CCW: Let me tell you something, and this will be quick. But I need to tell you this. I gave my life over to Jesus, and now no matter what happens in my life, I don't mind it. I can overcome it.
Me: Wow. That's great. (You said this will be quick. Can I go now? A family of joggers and their dog are looking at us.)
CCW: You know evolution is false, right? Yeah, like evolution happened! Like a fully formed car is going to just pop out of the ground! Evolution is wrong!
Me: I see. (I'm trying to leave now, so I won't point out that no evolutionary biologists think that a car will pop out of the ground, but religious people like you can believe that a car would just pop out of the ground...it would just be a "miracle". But although I hope we never meet again, I hope we can part in peace.)
CCW: Also, you know, humans have spirits! Animals don't! You know John 3:16, right?
Me: Uh-huh.
CCW: "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." But most people stop there. It goes on, though. "For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son." Do you understand now?!
CCW: "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." But most people stop there. It goes on, though. "For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son." Do you understand now?!
Me: So let me ask you a question. Imagine that a 5-year-old Japanese girl who hasn't done anything wrong...
CCW: EVERYONE is a sinner!
CCW: EVERYONE is a sinner!
Me: OK, but just let me finish. A 5-year-old Japanese girl who hasn't murdered people or raped or anything...a sweet 5-year-old Japanese girl who is not Christian...gets killed when an atomic bomb explodes over her. Do you think she should be tortured in Hell forever?
CCW: Murder and rape are just results of sin. Adam and Eve sinned against God and brought the whole world into sin. All have sinned. Murder and rape are just effects. The way out of sin is through Jesus.
CCW: Murder and rape are just results of sin. Adam and Eve sinned against God and brought the whole world into sin. All have sinned. Murder and rape are just effects. The way out of sin is through Jesus.
Me: OK. But would that Japanese girl go to Hell?
CCW: There are two types of people. Some people realize that they are all sinners, and all sinners are worthy of death, no matter how big or small the sin. Other people think that if you do good actions, that's good enough.
Me: Yeah, I align more with that second group.
CCW: But the Bible says that you're wrong! God is a merciful god, but he is also a just god!
CCW: There are two types of people. Some people realize that they are all sinners, and all sinners are worthy of death, no matter how big or small the sin. Other people think that if you do good actions, that's good enough.
Me: Yeah, I align more with that second group.
CCW: But the Bible says that you're wrong! God is a merciful god, but he is also a just god!
Me: So you're saying that a nice Japanese girl who gets caught in an atomic bomb blast, and maybe only lied about not having candy when she actually had candy...that she deserves Hell? Eternal torture?
CCW: That is what the Bible says. The only ones who can enter heaven are those with faith in Jesus.
CCW: That is what the Bible says. The only ones who can enter heaven are those with faith in Jesus.
Me: You know what, that is exactly what I hate about Christianity! If God rewards good actions, then great. That's a nice god. But if God sends people to Hell for not believing in him and you support him, then you are more like that Nazi. You support that.
CCW: I'll tell you how you can get to Heaven. If you trust in Jesus...
Me: If God is like that, then I don't want to go to Heaven. I'll burn with the Japanese.
CCW: It's not only Japanese. It's Americans, too.
CCW: I'll tell you how you can get to Heaven. If you trust in Jesus...
Me: If God is like that, then I don't want to go to Heaven. I'll burn with the Japanese.
CCW: It's not only Japanese. It's Americans, too.
Me: (OK. That makes me feel even better.) You know, when you go to heaven, why don't you look down happily from above to watch everyone burning. You can be SO happy! (I start walking away.)
CCW: Oh, no. I won't be happy.
CCW: Oh, no. I won't be happy.
End of conversation.
It's a good thing that I didn't bring up animal (including "turkle", WTF?) rights. Then, that kind God-fearing woman would have met a strident, outspoken, and rude atheist AND vegetarian! Why can't we atheists just keep our beliefs to ourselves!
It's a good thing that I didn't bring up animal (including "turkle", WTF?) rights. Then, that kind God-fearing woman would have met a strident, outspoken, and rude atheist AND vegetarian! Why can't we atheists just keep our beliefs to ourselves!
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